1. Ticks take all the fun out of an unexpected, spontaneous stroll through the woods.
Especially teeny tiny eensy weensy seed ticks that your five-year-old can barely see good enough to remove with your best pair of tweezers.
2. Never underestimate an old cow’s greatest strength.
She might just hold the title of Head Butting Champion of the Herd. In which case, it might not be easy to rope her and load her in the trailer without going head-to-head with her.
3. Cinnamon Rolls are quite effective at removing kids from their 3″ memory foam topped mattresses.
4. Smoke alarms work well too.
5. Together, they’re brilliant.
Especially when the smoke was produced from the dripping buttery sweetness bubbling over the dish, having no effect on the deliciousness of the cinnamon rolls.
6. If you see a cowboy hat on the side of the road near the Drummond ranch, just keep driving. It’s prolly worn out.
Because if your kids are anything like mine, they’ll want to wear it anyway. Nevermind that they have nice, new fitted cowboy hats that are clean.